License To Frill: Interview with The Curator

Hello my dark darlings ~

The Curator is back from the grave to post a "lolita level" challenge while I try my damn hardest to make it through a no-buy. I think my wardrobe is at a place now where I have mostly everything I need so it is time to cool off the spending and start enjoying what I have. I came across this challenge from lolita YouTuber Pinkfakeflowers and thought it would be fun to do now that I am just past the six month mark in my lolita journey. I am by no means an expert and certainly not an intermediate either. Maybe I will do this challenge again at the one year mark to see how far I have come!

Would Mana-sama be proud of my collection?

♱ཐི ʕ.•ﻌ•.ʔ ཋྀ♱

Lolita Journey ♡

How did you discover lolita fashion?

When I was in high school, I came across a Lovely Lor video on YouTube that exposed me to the fashion. I think I was searching for maid cafe content because I was going through a slight "weeb" phase. I have no idea why the algorithm thought this would be adjacent content.

How has your style changed since you discovered the fashion (if it has at all?)

There was a period of years from when I first discovered EGL to when I bought my first piece (and then a few more years before I started collecting pieces and building a full wardrobe). At that time I was a strict gothic lolita. I had zero interest in any other style. Now I am starting to explore classic and old school sweet. Someday I want to explore ouji and aristocratic as well.

What was your first main piece? Do you still own it?

I have discussed this in my introduction post, but my first piece was Atelier Pierrot's Labyrinth Lace JSK in the black colorway. I sold it to a thrift shop as I eventually lost interest in the fashion. But recently I purchased the red colorway so my baby has returned to me!

Can you show us a picture of (one of) your first coord(s)?

Looking back, I do feel like my first coord was rather plain. And it barely read as gothic if it were not for the pops of red. It is basically a kuro look, which is wonderful but was not my intention. My comm seemed to love it however. To quote one member: "How does it feel to completely skip your ita phase?" It is so fascinating to look back on photos taken only six or seven months ago and already have so much more knowledge and expertise. I am proud of the coording progress I have already made in such a short period of time!

When you joined the fashion, what was the most active online community?

Facebook and Instagram; I joined in 2023 so by that point, the LiveJournal community was already sort of dead.

What is something that was popular when you joined, but isn’t any more?

I think casual coording is super popular right now. I see many blouse-less coords on Instagram lately and I love it. Especially here in Arizona, it is too hot to always be wearing a blouse. It is nice to see this has become more socially accepted.

What was the most popular ‘look’/substyle when you joined?

Sweet is still the most popular, in the community as a whole and in my local scene.

What was the least popular ‘look’/substyle when you joined?

Personally I think old-school and classic are less popular right now in the overall community. In the Arizona comm, gothic is not very popular. I simply cannot imagine why † ཐི❤︎ཋྀ † So I guess you can say I am my comm's "go-to goth".

Have you noticed a change in the community’s values/beliefs since you joined (this could be related to the fashion like the community stance on replicas or to ‘politics’ like more open conversations on discrimination)?

It is too soon to say. In the half-year I have been wearing lolita, I do not think much has changed in the community's beliefs. I do see more and more lolitas posting advocacy for marginalized groups on their lolita-specific Instagram accounts. It actually makes sense; the fashion itself is a feminist movement. I hope this trend continues.

What is a current lolita goal you have?

I have so many ㅠ_ㅠ But a main one at the current moment is to build a classic capsule wardrobe. So far I only have one coord, sans legwear. I will return to this goal when my no-buy is over.

How has wearing lolita changed you or your lifestyle?

(TW/CW: ED, disordered eating, mental health) I do not mean to get too personal on this blog, but in some ways lolita has improved and harmed my self-image. I am always someone who feels better about myself when I feel pretty. So lolita has helped me with that in many ways. Coming home from a long day at the office to throw on a frilly dress and a silly headpiece just to sit on the couch with my roommate's cats is one of my life's simplest pleasures. Conversely, being a plus-size lolita has done a lot of harm to my perception of my body. I have always struggled with my weight but wearing lolita has triggered some old disordered eating habits as majority of my gothic favorite brands do not cater to my size. Does that make me any less of a lolita? Hell no. Am I working with a therapist to combat these negative thoughts? Hell yes. Should you seek care if you too find yourself struggling with negative self-image? Yes to infinity!

What is one piece of advice you wish you could give to every new lolita?

When reading the measurements of a garment, understand that you will need to be at least 3~4 cm less than the maximum if you want it to fit comfortably and be able to move. If a dress bust is a maximum of 100 cm and your bust IS 100 cm, baby you do not fit :( This is the dress's problem, not you; how dare that dress! This may seem obvious to some, but I have beans for brains.

Wardrobe ♡

How many main pieces do you own?

17! Two of the dresses do not fit thought and I am planning to bring them to the next swap meet. So if those two do not count, then 15.

Outside of main pieces, what do you own the most of?

Headpieces and legwear. As it should be! A goth can never have too many lacy tights.

What is your favorite brand?

My favorite brand that I wear the most often is Atelier Pierrot. My favorite jewelry brand is Néant Glass. And my favorite brands for their aesthetic are Moi-même-Moitié and Antique BeasT.

Do you prefer shopping from Japanese, Chinese, Western or other brands for your main pieces?

I don't really have a preference, it just depends on what I need to buy. I do prefer the designs of Japanese brands more than Western brands.

Where do you do most of your shopping/do you buy more new or second-hand?

I prefer to buy new in general. But I noticed I tend to buy my main pieces and bags second-hand and almost everything else new. I buy majority of my things second-hand from Closet Child and Lace Market and new items from Wunderwelt and Atelier Pierrot's international website (as they are a retailer for many brands).

How many dream dresses do you have (and how many have you found?)

I currently only own one of my dream dresses, Ista Mori Nameless Poem OP. I have many other dream dresses but none of them would fit me at my current size, so I just admire them from afar ~ I am still on the hunt for

Gothic dream dresses:

Krad Lanrete Transilvania Moonlight JSK
Moi-même- Moitié Rose Cross Shirred OP
Physical Drop Organdy Babydoll OP
Innocent World Pearskin Doll Tiered JSK (in black)
Haenuli Stained Glass: Saint Vitus JSK

Classic dream dresses (all Innocent World):

Heart Rose Shirring JSK
Antique Bouquet High Waist JSK
Violets Inside Mansions High Waist JSK
Maiden's Rose Garden Cross Ribbon JSK
Lucienne JSK

Have you ever had anything custom-made for you?

Yes, way back when I bought my first dress I did commission an Etsy artist to make me a custom rectangle headdress to match. I still have it to this day. I also own an Antique BeasT bolero that I had Yuuki custom size to fit. Contrary to what her website says, she can actually custom size any of her pieces (her site says she can only change a measurement -/+ 5cm).

What was the most expensive item you’ve bought?

Probably Enchantlic Enchantilly Rose Castle ~Invitation From The Duke of Bat~ OP. I bought the re-release brand new for $325.

Personal ♡

How would you describe your own personal style?

Vampiric, romantic, lots of black, white, and bordeaux. With some Victorian influences and Catholic elements.

What are your favorite colors to wear?

Black, white, any shade of red (but especially bordeaux), and silver.

What is your favorite piece of clothing you own (at the moment?)

Angelic Pretty Lacy Princess JSK in black. It makes me feel like a princess.

How do you wash your clothes: machine, by hand, dry clean only?

Depends on the item but dresses I hand wash, almost everything else by machine.

When/where do you usually wear lolita fashion (outside of quarantine) Are you comfortable wearing lolita alone?

I am not comfortable wearing lolita to medical appointments or work, but almost everywhere else I wear it. I am comfortable wearing lolita alone, but it also depends on where I am going.

Does your interest in lolita influence your non-lolita clothes/home decor/hobbies.. Etc?

Oh yes absolutely! I have begin to lolify my bedroom to match my dark aesthetic. Before I started wearing lolita, I wore goth fashion. New ideas I get for gothic lolita coords create new ideas for goth outfits and vice versa. I also picked up knitting again. I eventually want to buy a sewing machine and start making things.

What is a pet-peeve or unpopular opinion you have about lolita (or the community)?

I hate to say it but sometimes when I am scrolling through Big Sisters of EGL Fashion (a Facebook group for newbies to ask questions of veterans), I hate seeing people ask blatantly stupid questions that could easily be answered if they did more research and planning. It always shows that they do not actually care to learn more and want an "easy" way into the fashion without understanding the context/history behind it. They do not seem to care why it can be so expensive, or why quality matters, or why you cannot just buy something off Amazon and call it a day. It is insulting to the fashion.

What is a current trend you love, and one that you dislike?

A trend I love right now is Angelic Pretty's all-over prints. I know most prefer their border prints (and that I do not even wear sweet!) but I think their newer designs are super cute. A trend I dislike is releasing sweet prints in black colorways; in my humble opinion they never look good :/

What is something ‘outdated’ that you wish would become popular again?

I wish gobelin was popular again so Meta would release something in it!!

Do you need to wear makeup with lolita for it to look good?

Absolutely not! That being said having your hair put together and makeup done really does change the look of a coord.

Do you think lolitas should behave in a certain way, or is it just clothes (attitude doesn’t matter)?

I think to a certain extent you should try to be nice to strangers when wearing lolita in public as this is a niche fashion and you walking around your local grocery store is going to be some people's first exposure to the fashion. Ideally yes you would want to set a good example since eyes are going to be on you regardless of your behavior.

How important is being creative/experimental in lolita?

Honestly I don't think you would have much interest in any sort of niche alternative fashion if you were not already a creative and/or experimental person.

What has been your favorite meet up or event that you’ve attended?

My favorite meet-up so far has been summer ILD with my comm. We went to a local tea house and exchanged handmade gifts. I made so many precious friends that day.

What is your favorite part of wearing lolita fashion?

Feeling like that rich Victorian widow my inner child always wanted to become. Also all the compliments I get from little girls whenever I am out in public.

Do you find lolita clothes uncomfortable, or tiring to wear?

As someone with a chronic illness, yes all the layers and the heat do get to me. The shoes can hurt my feet. My wig can give me headaches. My headdress or JSK straps might fall down. I still do it all again the next day.

Do you consider yourself part of a comm, or a lonelita?

I am a very happy member of the Arizona EGL Community! You can find us on Facebook.

What is your favorite ‘era’ of lolita fashion?

OTT sweet era was when I first discovered lolita, so it is nostalgic for me. I want the trend to come back.

What is your image of ~lolita perfection~?

I do not think I will ever achieve this (nor should anyone necessarily strive to) but to live the full lolita lifestyle, complete with living in a cottage or castle!